Clarity, perhaps? It's all about life in so many ways...

Okay, as with most things, time offers a little clarity, even if it doesn't heal all. Yesterday as I was in the last class of my Bible study, I realized that I was speaking submission to God's plan for us, but I wasn't actually living it. As we were discussing what submission to God really looked like, I started getting this visual of what I define as submission in my dog. Okay, I know, I know, if you know Vince and his incorageable ways, you're thinking this is a bit of a stretch, but work with me here. To be fully submitted, it requires more than his butt on the ground in a sit position. If his mind is still moving forward, even though his body is in obedience posture, he's not really submitting. And I realized that this describes me in this process. I have my butt on the ground in the submissive posture to God, but my mind is moving on to plan B and C "in case God doesn't come through for me" or something like that. So, as I suspected, God was really waiting for ME (rather than the other way around) as usual, to be able to move forward. Isn't it so funny that so many times we think we have to wait for God's timing, when in reality, God's ready, it's us He's waiting on. So, not to say I am anywhere close to where I need to be to move forward on this, but just finally realized that God's got some "stuff" he's weeding out of me before He can give me His full blessing and protection.

Brian went to a men's retreat a couple of weeks ago and one of the things that really stuck with him was that God didn't say, "Follow me and it will be smooth sailing." He actually said that it wouldn't be easy, it would not be fun sometimes, (after all, look at what Jesus' life was like... he was virtually homeless and fully dependent on the love and generosity of those around him, but he was always provided for) but He did say we would always be held in His protection if we were walking in His way. And the price is ALWAYS worth the outcome with God. That's the beauty of the whole thing.

This is unrelated to our adoption, but this seems to be a recurring theme for Brian and I with people all around us right now, so I need a place to just lay down my thoughts. This seems like as good a place as any. Seems like it keeps being revealed to us that there are many people around us who are either pro-choice, or at least pro-choice with restrictions and in some cases. I have such a hard time processing how my Christian friends can have a belief that so vastly veers from the nature of God. I just don't understand this point of view. I have tried to have intelligent, non-emotional conversations on the topic, but I still have yet to hear anything that I could even sort of believe. Last night one of our friends, who I had always considered to be a fairly "fundamental" believer, revealed to us that she is pro-choice. Her argument was that she didn't see this as a "religious" (or moral) issue, but as strictly political. This prompted a conversation from Brian and I this morning about how that can be and just trying to evaluate our views in light of that. Do we invite government into too much by favoring overturn of Roe v. Wade? The bottom line is that I believe that God can redeem ANY life. This friend of ours argued that in some cases, there are things worse than death. I guess in her opinion, this might include life in an orphanage. And who is to judge which things are worse and which ones aren't? Do we limit God's ability to redeem the lowest of low, the worst of situations when we become judge and jury on whether this soul has a right to a chance at life? Who said that "hard" equals "unworthy"? At what point is hard too hard? I mean, how do you determine? Is there a certain level of poverty below which no life should be sustained? Is there a certain level of deviance from "acceptable norms"? Doesn't that sound a little "Hitler-ish"? I just CAN'T seem to make sense of this argument. I know people who have carried babies to term with untold amount of deformities and syndromes, only to be surprised by the immense blessing they received from their committment to doing the "right" thing inthe eyes of God. Haven't you experienced that, where you find yourself in the midst of something you would never have chosen, wondering why on earth God would ask you to endure something so miserably painful, only to find that He brought you through the desert to deliver you into a land of milk and honey? Really, Moses journey for 40 years was a pretty good foreboding of what the Lord has in store for us if we only perservere. Anyway, it's just so sad to me and I needed a place to put it down. There are so few of you reading this at this point that I'm sure it won't set the world on it's ears anyway! :) I think I have about four followers.